Painful Prejudices [nsfw]

Selena breathed softly, the pain still there but her exhaustion winning out as Luca laid down... Sensing a hollow so close and doing nothing about it...

It went against her every instinct, but the soft smell of Luca overwhelmed that. Within moments she fell into a peaceful sleep and her hand relaxed its grip as she took the deeper breaths of sleep. Tomorrow...whenever she woke up was time enough to deal with this.

Luca remained awake, sleep was something that came with difficulty; he...should not be the one here, there were plenty of things better suited to...lying here to assist her in keeping nightmares away.

Eventually he managed to get...perhaps and hour or two of sleep, as he eventually dozed off; he...would need to get her food, and something to drink still... it would also be for the best to...hide the things she'd given him that he'd...put rather obviously in his room.

It would only cause more pain if he didn't...

He could not get up right now though, he had to make dues with lying here while she rested...

He kept his eyes closed, whether he was sleeping or awake; he felt her hand loosen its hold on his, and he could very well pull away...but...he had been asked to remain here, and so he did not move.

Selena didn't sleep more than a few hours, waking up due to the odd air of Hueco Mundo after a bit. She stirred a bit, the first sign she was waking before her eyes opened and she groaned. Pain in her chest and abdomen...body aching elsewhere...eyes swollen as she raised a hand to rub them.

Her other hand was lightly held in someone else's and she knew immediately who it was... even if she wasn't awake yet. "Luca...you stayed the night?"

A much hoarser than usual voice, a bit strained by pain... "I got a cold...you shouldn't...lay with me... you'll catch it."

Cold...she had a cold... Where were the pets? They should be mobbing... she could barely open her eyes it seemed yet.

She was waking up, and as she spoke, he opened his eyes; she...did not remember right now, her exhaustion keeping her from doing so.

A cold...

That wasn't true, but...

Luca pulled away; "It...is not a cold, but I will move."

When she realized, she would not want him near here...no matter what she had said yesterday, she had overexerted herself, and...once she woke up more she would likely be able to make more sense of the situation.

He should not be near her...

He moved from the bed, stepping back; he chose to focus on...getting her things she needed. "I will...get you something to drink; water...would be recommended..."

He had a few things, a few food items and drinks from the human world that he had brought back with him on a few visits, having liked their taste. He had water here already, but he'd gotten water bottles one time because they seemed convenient.

Luca's words sent a visible jolt from her as her eyes finally opened. Selena tried to sit up and failed due to pain, luckily for her immediate panic. Luca...monster...

Hueco Mundo...she knew where she was...now... She was trapped and the monster was...

Taking care of her. She took deep breaths, calming herself as her eyes followed him. There wasn't much emotion in them, though now she was fully awake. He'd had to lay with her to keep the nightmares away... she'd held his hand...

Bringing that hand up to her lap, she looked at it as if...it was some odd thing. She'd touched...

"I don't want water... I don't want anything." Her voice was dead as her hand and arm fell back to the bed. She stared straight ahead at the ceiling, willing away every shred of emotion away... As long as she didn't look at him...

"It would...be for the best that you have something..." Luca replied; "It...will help you with your recovery..."

Her tone of voice... Luca went over to a few cabinets in the room, meant for...things to display but he'd put a variety of snack items in there that did not require cooling.

He gathered a few things in his arms before stepping towards the bed, he placed them there at the bedside table before immediately stepping away.

He...needed to treat her, and make sure she was alright, but he should also not be near her...

He would...return to the sofa, with that in mind, he approached that area of his room again. He could...hold onto something then, his violin case...

"...I don't...need to recover..." Selena just gave up for now, letting the pain rule her. The pain from her body and emotions was too much, she burned too hotly and always felt too much and why... why this...

Of all people why him?! Why why why why why why...

It was better to not feel.

She'd...hopefully die of her injuries or some sort of illness... that would be best...

It would be... best to just disappear...

Suffering a large shock such as this after her injuries and near death set the woman on a rather...self defeating path for the moment.

"I...You have others...that would want you to recover, I...would like for you to as well..." The others were of higher importance though, she should...recover for them.

She needed to recover for them...

Luca had a firm hold on his case again, it...helped somewhat, not much but...he would take anything. "I am sorry. I am...sorry..."

He could...not change what he was, there was nothing he could do to fix himself. He had...died long ago...and this was the fate he'd been given...

"It...doesn't matter..." Selena's voice stayed that same mellow tone without change or any sign of shifting. She didn't want to... She didn't...why... Why why why this...

She didn't move one inch, just stared up at the ceiling. Maybe if the injuries didn't kill her she could...just refuse to eat.

It was as she thought of this plan that... that... his sorries. That caused a reaction, a low sob as she started crying again. When he said that...like this... she couldn't stay like this! Her arm flew up to cover her eyes as a pained cry shot through her. Those weak barriers she was erecting were toppled but such... "No! Luca...stop...stop being...sorry..."

"You are...so stupid...why did you lie to me...why did you make me love you? You stupid... I love all three of you and you just... Why... Arrancar and Quincy don't mix...what were you thinking..." A stream of thoughts escaped her as she spoke, too much rough emotion in her voice after the dead one she had been speaking in.

It didn't matter? It...It did matter though, she had...those other two, and...and her pets waiting for her...

It mattered.

His hold on his case tightened as he heard her cry, his head lowering toward the hard material. How could he not be sorry?

"No matter what there is no immediate positive-emotion in someone's opinion toward...us." Luca explained, his tone still weak; "I...originally, it was just...because it was meant to be a secret...but...as time passed I realized...

...I didn't want to be hated, I did not want to be hated for something I could not change, but...I was foolish, such a wish is impossible. Unavoidable...

I...enjoyed being able to...become close, make...connections with others...but...I never should have, it meant hurting...

...I claimed to be something I was not out of fear. I felt that fear of being hated by someone...I actually had come to care for..."

That was unavoidable though, no matter what...

It hurt.

It hurt, it hurt, it hurt... he didn't like it...

"It...It is alright, as I said...after you've recovered...I will not bother you again. Unless specifically ordered to...I will not even step food in the Human World again...

I don't...want to hurt like this; I do not want to...feel this pain anymore...making connections...caused this...my lies caused this; solitude is more suited to me...that way...I do not have to worry about...feeling pains that I cannot heal, feeling...emotions that only lead to pain...

I had lost them before...there is no reason that I cannot lose them once more..."

His...explanation made sense but she didn't want it to. Selena didn't want to hear sense or anything of the sort... She wanted him to be an awful lying monster she could hate.

But instead he was Luca, sweet and terrified Luca... He was hurting because of her, she was the sole cause of this. How...could she hate him... When all he wanted was to not hurt... When he was going to go...

He was going to leave her because of her...

He was a monster...

He was not a monster...

He needed those emotions...

Well he would stay over there without her... She dealt with someone she hated on a daily basis... dealing with someone she loved and wanted to protect, even if she was angry and scared of him... even if she was so hurt it couldn't bare thinking...

Moving on the bed, she once more left it. The rest had improved her strength enough that she could hobble while holding it as she moved towards the end. "You aren't allowed...I don't care...what else...you aren't... I don't know anything right now! Okay! But...you aren't...I know you aren't allowed to go."

He wasn't...he could be a stinking monster and he wouldn't be allowed to go anywhere... He had to stay with her.

"..." Luca's eyes went to her as he heard her shuffling in the bed again, hearing the covers shift. She...she was trying to get up again.

Why?

Why was she doing this?

"...Then what am I supposed to do...?" If he couldn't leave, then what could he do? What was he supposed to do? He didn't know, he didn't understand this...

What was he supposed to do then?

If he couldn't...

Okay she had...reached the end of the bed, she had nothing more to hold onto... Selena hurt a lot but fucking hell! Did she have to spell this out for him?

"Stay...with me..." Selena's voice was soft and weak as she let go of the bed, crying again over this stupid arrancar. "I forbid...you losing them again... I worked so hard to help you..."

She absolutely forbid it. Standing as tall as she could, she wobbled her way towards Luca with determined eyes. Stupid fucking arrancar from stupid ugh! She was angry and hurt still but she...just she had to. "I said I loved you. That...means I won't let you go... ever... you aren't allowed to leave...or love another... you're mine..."

Possessive and jealous to a T and she wouldn't even for a freaking arrancar let them go when they were hers!

Again, Luca had quieted; she...wanted him to stay with her, she forbid him from losing his emotions...

...

Before he could completely process his thoughts, his eyes caught Selena attempting to hobble over; he...with the bed she'd at least had something to hold on to, now...

He set down the case, immediately heading towards her; his hands went out to help her, hovering in case she needed support. "You...shouldn't move so much..."

She was...forbidding him to leave, claiming he was hers...

He didn't...understand...not completely; she...he wanted...to feel happiness, this wasn't something he expected to hear but...

...He was an...arrancar...though...

"Then stop sitting there stupidly on that couch." Selena muttered, the pain making her irritable on top of everything else. His hands hovered and she stepped forward, her arms going out and holding onto his clothing, refusing to let go as she gently settled herself against him. Her head on his chest, her hands holding his top, she shook slightly from the effort to stand but...

Hollow... hollow she sensed it so strong right there.

She'd just have...to get used to it. She'd have to get used to it...

She wasn't letting him go damn it. No one else could have him!

Luca remained still as Selena stepped forward, settling against him as her hands held on to his clothing. His arms settled lightly around her, their hovering stopping for the most part.

Standing...she should...not stand for too long.

He held her lightly before attempting to help her back to the bed; it was closer than the couch, and much more comfortable. The snacks were over there too...

There were also more in the display cabinets he could get...

Selena let him lead them back over to the bed, it was where she felt she needed to be... rest was good... Nothing was settled in her head at all, except for that thought that he was too special to her...

She didn't...feel any better about the arrancarness...or anything else... really... Luca was warm at least and thats what mattered for now.

"Pain...medicines...do you have any?" It would help if she could get rid of this stupid...constant pain... maybe drink some liquids...eat something and build up strength... She was running on willpower alone at this point as she settled back on the bed. "You...aren't...allowed to leave for too long..."

Pain medications... When he had research alternate methods he had gotten some, wanting to look further into modern medicines he was overall unfamiliar with...

"In my work area, I have some..." He replied once Selena was settled back on the bed; he reached over towards the snacks on the table; "I can get some, and you can eat...I will provide water as well...It will not be a long trip to my work area...it's only down the hall..."

She could snack and rest while he got the water and medication.

"Is there anything else you need?"

Nodding, Selena sighed a bit and tried to get comfortable. She looked at the snacks offered and tried not to laugh as she pulled a bag of beef jerky towards her. She could go anemic, it'd be best to eat some of this first... As long as he didn't take too long she'd be fine.

"...Would it be...easier to use your...healing powers on me?" Selena's voice was halted as Luca asked if that was all. She... she didn't want to be an invalid for days... weeks...? How long would this take?

She couldn't stay here... She was a quincy in Hueco Mundo... wherever she was. Was...

"...Are you...one of the Espada?" Her voice squeaked on the last word, having not thought about the fact that this was a fairly nice room and home for an apparently blood soaked desert. That was important to know.

"I am...unsure about using my abilities on you." As she had stated, Quincies and Arrancar were not something that mixed; her own fear of other's blood, along with the fact his was of an arrancar...he was uncertain...

Perhaps...if he diluted it enough...

"Perhaps...if I diluted the medicines I create from it enough..." He mused, mostly to himself before his attention returned to her.

He glanced down at the covers of the bed, silent before he glanced back at her; "I am the Septimo Espada, Luca."

A...much more truthful and proper introduction in comparison to his first...at least...

"If I'll heal faster... I'm willing to try..." Selena gave a weak smile as she chewed the jerky, it was such a pain and just...gross bag beef jerky. Anemia...versus eating this...

Diluted medicine would be as good as anything...but... "Not...if it'll take you away too long. I...don't want you gone. When I don't look at you...I feel...too bad..."

Seeing him reaffirmed things, settled her thoughts... she couldn't think of him as a monster when he was standing right there and touching her.

When he was gone... She needed to get used to it. She needed to get used to... it...

Septimo espada.

He was an Espada... he... Selena' paled a bit before laughing and attempting to be her old self before wincing from the pain. "I've...been screwing the Septimo Espada..."

"I'll...see about getting one of the more diluted ones then..." Luca nodded to himself, he would try if...Selena wanted to.

The medicine did not look like blood at all, but it still held the elements his blood contained.

"I have some...I was merely wondering if I should attempt to dilute it further..."

The more diluted, the less painful it should be...correct? What mattered were the healing elements, if he could somehow...

His thoughts were cut off by her laughter before a wince followed; "...I have not held the position for long..."

Long in his terms anyway...

He had only been given the position...just a time before he'd met her.

"I'll...try it." Selena couldn't promise anything and gave a weak smile. Don't think about how it came about, just let him get the pain medicines and healing medicines. She shook her head at his suggestion. "No... just...go get it all and...come back."

He could...try another time to do that. She needed him here.

The words he hadn't been it long just caused her to nod, though she had a confused look on her face. "Still...is funny I guess... Hurry back...please."

She didn't want to have to keep eating this crappy jerky...

"Alright." Luca nodded; they would...see how it worked, he hoped it would be diluted enough...

When she told him to hurry back, he gave another nod.

"It won't take long, I'll return shortly..." Saying that, he backed away from the bed and made his way out of the room.

He made a straight walk towards the room down the hall, entering it and heading directly towards where he kept everything. Pain medication...and his own medicine, he gathered those along with a couple of the water bottles he had before leaving.

His arms a bit full, he reentered the room where Selena was waiting.

"I brought water as well..." The pain medication were pills, so the water would be helpful for more than just her refreshment.

Approaching the bed, he set the items down next to the snacks at the table, handing her the pain medication and water before holding the glass container with his own medicine; it was clear for the most part, one would hardly even guess what it was made of by looking at it.

"It's something you apply..."

Selena nodded and then relaxed against the pillows as Luca's form became unbearably blurry and then became a smudge that left the room. He'd be back soon... she needed to eat more of these before he was. Pain medication needed food in the stomach too...

At least generally.

Luca was true to his word and didn't stay long, coming back rather promptly though she was staring at the door intently while he was gone. When his blurred form reappeared, she smiled in relief. Being left along with her thoughts was no good right now.

As he set the extra items down, she then accepted the water and pill bottle before opening the latter. Tossing two into her mouth, they were...strong so she was sure they'd work as she popped the top off of the water and quickly downed it. The water was...amazingly good after so long and she realized part of her pain was a lack of hydration.

"Thanks..." After she screwed the top back on, she glanced up to Luca's face and then down at the bottle. It was clear and she didn't feel any revulsion at it. Even knowing it was made from... but it didn't...it wasn't red.

Nodding at his words, she pulled the covers down, lifted the sweater up with a pain and stared at the slightly bled through bandages. "Your the doctor, you should do this..."

Her eyes went up to his and something...odd shone in them. Trust perhaps. A bit of the old trust was there.