Major Otter Trauma [nsfw]

Miyako continued to play with his hair but didn't pull Hibiki closer or anything. She just laid there, trying to soothe him and herself again. "But...I didn't see...see much...just...Muika and...y-you..."

Blood so much blood why all the blood...

Miyako gulped and pushed away those thoughts. "B-But I chose you... so do I have...have a right to normal reactions? You've...killed people."

"I'm scared now... I wasn't before...but you scared me...then..." She should at least admit that... Hibiki was scary now... a bit scary...

Aito's hold loosened on Miyako's hand, his body tense as she spoke.

That... That was the last thing he wanted to hear...

"...I said...I wasn't good..." He repeated his words from back then, back when Miyako had stubbornly attempted to reassure him he was, before she'd just suddenly kissed him. Though unlike last time, his words were a lot weaker and halted.

Having her scared of him...

He wasn't just going to bring it up, that he had had to do that to survive... It didn't change a damn thing. It was just an excuse... He'd still...

"I told you...I wasn't...wasn't a good person..." Again he said it, but his tone grew no stronger. "That's not...not something I can ever...ever take back..."

His past was his, it'd happened...and there wasn't a damn thing he could do about it. In the end he was still a subject.

"Yeah...I did...I won't try to excuse myself..." Orders or not, back then that'd been the easiest thing to do. Being obedient to their wishes and taking out whoever they wanted him to, it was easier than their damn drugs...

Easier...

"At first...I was just scared like everyone else...I...I cried and screamed...kicked like everyone else... I couldn't stay that way though, but I'm not gonna use their orders as an excuse... I just did what was easiest..."

Miyako's hand pulled Hibiki's hair a bit sharply as she reacted to his words with silence. Just because...because he was... a bit scary at the moment...wasn't any reason to refuse his goodness.

He'd killed... and did it because it was easiest...

She wasn't supposed to lie... "I could lie...I could say that doesn't make me more scared...and more nervous... You say it was the easiest to kill them... Even seeing that... I can't... I can't imagine its...easier to kill others... Even ordered...but I was never there... I don't know what its like... I never will..."

Maybe her powers... maybe they were representative of who she was... she was someone who wanted to help others... Who would do that no matter what... Even if it meant she died... Maybe that was why she couldn't make weapons... because she lacked that ability... to fight back even in her own mind.

"But...you aren't bad... I-I said it before. Someone whose bad doesn't do things like feel guilt... They don't help others and save them... You aren't bad..." Even if she was scared when before there wasn't any fear, nervous and weak... Hibiki wasn't a bad person.

"It...It was easier than them pumping hell knows what drugs in me...it was...easier than refusing...and having to do something to myself...none of it was..." None of it was ideal, it was just bending to their will to satisfy his own survival...

But again...he wasn't excusing himself...

Kill, or face punishment...

Some of those scars she'd healed, the deeper ones...a good many of them weren't caused by the fighting, he'd made them...

Against his will, but he'd made them...

Wasn't bad... Her words didn't hold the strength in them that made him react like he previously had, instead just just kept his face to the pillow, his body still tense.

Miyako just...nodded against the bed. He'd had to do it, it didn't mean it was anything less scary to her... it didn't mean she wasn't still nervous... But she knew Hibiki had had to do it, he'd HAD to survive and if...he hadn't done those things... The Hibiki she knew wouldn't be here... "I'd be dead if I was there... dead..."

She moved then, finally uncurling herself in spite of her feelings and leaning down over Hibiki... His hand had to be let go, but instead she laid herself against his back, resting her head on top of his and wrapping her arms around him as best she could. He could feel her shaky breaths but it was fine. She wasn't hiding anything from him right now..."But you.. You survived and made it out...and its true. You aren't bad. You aren't a bad person... I mean it. Once...before we dated I told someone I thought you were amazing. You and Muika...because...because we all start out at zero, not good or bad... but you two had so many awful things...s-so many scary things... happen...and did many bad things to survive but..."

"Doesn't that...doesn't it make it harder for you to do good things? To save others and care? But you still do... You still have all that inside. It's easy...for me to be all nice and kind...and good I guess because I never had that..." Miyako knew she was rambling, but it was helping her even if he didn't...listen... "But for you two to even be a bit nice it takes a lot more... You're working up past the negatives into the positives, not from zero... it takes more good. More kindness... to counter all that bad that was pushed on you."

"...So...I guess I'm saying you, Hibiki Ikehara...are a good person. A better person than someone like me is." She'd rambled...rambled lots... and she was still so freaking upset but... this was...

She wasn't there though, she didn't have to worry about that...

That place was dying out, and while it wasn't completely gone...they weren't really much of a threat anymore, as he'd already explained...

Aito remained still and stiff as Miyako let go of his hand to move over to him, laying herself against his back.

Wasn't bad...

It was hard, it was difficult for him to do things that weren't... That difficulty mostly lied in his emotions and words, his actions...those had come a bit easier, but...

It still didn't mean he could fully accept it, it wasn't likely he would fully for a long time. He didn't deny it for Miyako's sake, even when she predicted he was thinking it...

Eventually his body relaxed a little, but it was mostly due to his exhaustion. Whatever...it still counted...

With Hibiki frozen under her, Miyako knew her words might not reach him ever... ever reach him and she wasn't sure if it was right to force them on him like this... But as he relaxed she let out a breath.

"I promise... I swear to you... You aren't bad. I couldn't care about you if you were..." Miyako's voice cracked again as she started crying, his relaxing telling her... "Just because I'm scared right now... I haven't fled have I? I love you! That's...impossible if you were someone bad... At the least...you aren't either. Good or bad... You're in between right now."

Taking a breath, she asked in a soft whisper something she should have before... "What...did they make you do if you didn't listen...?"

...

"Mn..." Well, she'd said it...but it wasn't in the manner she'd wanted to. He wasn't sure whether to feel good about hearing it or not in that circumstance...even if she'd already basically said it in context...

Wasn't bad...in between...

He...He hardly knew what to feel, certainly not good.

What...they made him do...

"Those scars you healed...the darker ones, most of those were done by me." That would...give her an idea. "...Self-torture...anything that could...screw with your head...you didn't do that, they'd make it ten times more painful..."

Cutting yourself up...nails...fracturing to breaking a bone...he was luckly he hadn't lost anything...though one could hardly be lucky in a situation like that...

Miyako froze as soon as the words left Hibiki's mouth. Most of the darker... the worst ones... they were done by his own hands... No... no those people...were too cruel...

They forced kids to fight to the death, they messed with their head... forced them to stab and torture themselves or worse would happen... More painful, more awful...

She whimpered, but it was more for him than anything...

"...Strip... I'm double checking I got all of them..." Miyako clenched his shirt tightly, shaking with many emotions... Mostly anger and upsetness, but also others... pain for him and just a bonedeep sadness.

...Huh?

Aito's eyes finally opened, though it was only to blink once...twice... W...What...?

He attempted to turn his head slightly to get a look at her; double...double check...

He was pretty sure she'd gotten them all though. That one time she'd attempted to heal his legs she'd just sent a burst...he hadn't noticed any remaining ones.

She was serious about this?

"Y...You're serious?" Well, he had to question, even if the answer was brutally obvious.

"I have never been more serious in my life." Miyako blinked as Hibiki expressed his disbelief by turning his head as best he could and opening his eyes.

She moved off of his back to the edge of the bed, slipping to the floor and standing up so she could look down at him. "I am double checking every inch of you for marks!"

Every single inch!

So...she was serious. Just...just checking.

He blinked again as she slid off of him and moved to stand, he remained lying down for a bit longer still...in a bit of disbelief over this. He knew it was because she was worried, but suddenly just demanding him to strip like that...

Wh...What?

He blinked again before finally turning over and sitting up, though it was obvious he just wanted to lie back down. With a breath he removed his shirt, his instincts of shaking his hair out after to settle it never failing him as he set the article to the side.

Miyako couldn't help giggling weakly as Hibiki shook out his hair, summoning her power as the man set aside his shirt. She moved forward, happy he was humoring her but...hoping he understood she had to do this. Like he'd had to hold her...this was to make her feel not useless.

Something she could do... something only she could do...

She sat on the bed behind him, seeing his back and frowning... "I missed a few... I guess cause I was flustered..."

Letting her fingers trace the remaining scars first, her left hand picked up a dangling brush and then gently followed with its cooling touch. Heal...soothe...remove all traces of what they did...

"Mn..." Aito sat by, remaining still as he felt Miyako's finger trace one of the scars she'd missed. He hadn't even noticed she'd missed any, but then again he'd had a lot...so seeing most of them gone he'd just assumed they all were...

Another breath escaped as she actually began healing it, and just as she wanted him to he was still as she continued to work. If she found more she could heal them.

The few on his back were quickly removed, though she felt weaker than she should have as she began checking down his shoulders and arms. Her hands felt first for any that might be too faded for her to see entirely but...well it just felt like she was feeling him up mostly.

Her face was red as she caught a few more on him, the arms having more than expecting as she made him lift and hold them up so she could check every part. She was breathing a bit harder than normal, but not too much and just felt way more exhausted than she should... "Okay your front now and then we can move on...on to the rest."

Miyako seemed to find more on him, more than he'd expected her to find anyway...but he did as she wanted, lifting his arms when she asked him to, let her feel for more faded ones...

Though...

"Don't exhaust yourself..." His tone didn't make his words an order or anything, his own exhausted state just speaking out of concern at the moment, not caring if the tone...didn't fit him or anything.

She didn't need to go exhausting herself further... They could always do this in bursts. "At least take a break..."

"But if I do...then I'll be as tired as you are and we can nap together." Miyako admitted, having heard the weakness in Hibiki's voice and feeling bad for making him sit up like this but needing to help him. Getting weak was an added bonus!

She wasn't okay with anything, she wasn't... but maybe sleeping on it for now would help. Whatever had happened... Whatever it was... "Say, I just...disappeared? What happened? I was just playing with floofbutt..."

Her eyes glanced to the floor where the kitten had been laying, noting she had flopped herself slowly but surely over to the food dish and fallen asleep in it while eating.

"And then I was there, in...the place..." Her brush was lifted up to his chest and stomach as she double checked him... Maybe this would be enough for now...

"You're already tired though..." Aito retorted as Miyako went about checking his chest and stomach; he watched. She was already exhausted from everything else, she didn't need to wear herself out even further... This was always something they could come back to.

At her questions though, he gave a small nod.

"You just...disappeared. I came back home to have some...weird bubble in here." He explained, "I tried interacting with it at first, not knowing what to do...it sucked out some of my energy, I was able to feel that...so I went to try to find help, figure out what was going on...I couldn't attack it, there was no telling what would happen if I did..."

"...I-I'm not...enough to sleep though..." Miyako shuddered lightly, pausing in her attentions long enough to look up and see Hibiki watching her intently. She blinked and turned back to his chest, though not before her cheeks turned a bit red.

The red quickly faded as she listened, finishing up what she could see and feel of the scars on him, the very few remaining there and let her power fade. There were a lot of questions in her mind and she spoke the first as the young woman began stripping. Bed...would be nice and he had a shirt laying right there... "So there was a weird bubble? What did it look like? I wonder if it's happened to anyone else before... Why would it suck your energy in though?"

He didn't want to attack it and risk her... She'd be flushed thinking about that normally but right now it was just such a lot to take in.

"..." Aito didn't argue with Miyako's words on not being tired enough, he just trusted she would know when to stop since she knew this was a concern...

Nodding, he reached up with his hand push his hair back some for a short moment as if he were about to start on a tiring discussion.

"It's happening...in the city I know, I'm not sure but...it's probably happening all over..." He explained; "I don't know...really any details on it, I couldn't contact anyone to figure things out..."

He'd attempted to contact Okura and Osamoto, but he'd only attempted... Neither had answered their phones.

Why it sapped people of their energy he had no idea...

Miyako quickly got most of her clothes off as Hibiki brushed his hair back and spoke, tossing them beside the bed and nodding before grabbing his discarded shirt. She tugged it over her head and down her body before pulling her hair out and speaking finally. "S-So...are Muika and Iyuki okay? But you couldn't contact them... Maybe... Maybe I should try? Or try now..."

She was tired but there was obvious fear in her tone, hoping that the whatever it was hadn't taken those two and eaten them up... If it was happening all over... What could she do to fix it!? There was really nothing...

Hibiki needed rest though...and so she did but right now she wanted to make sure her friend was okay and felt...awful for not thinking to worry earlier. "H-Here you take off your pants and lay down and Ill get my phone and call."

"Might work..." He wasn't sure, but maybe if Miyako called it might work...it'd been a pretty good while since he'd last attempted.

Considering the circumstances, it was odd that neither had answered their phones.

He sat by as Miyako took his shirt, putting it on before telling him to get undressed and lay down. He gave a small nod, not arguing before he moved to do as told. Once the pants were off he went and slipped under the the blankets.

The best thing they could do really was...rest, and maybe hopefully sleep this whole ordeal over. There wasn't anything they could do...from the looks of it.

Miyako waited until Hibiki had tucked himself in, leaned down a bit shakily from weakness as she planted a soft kiss on his forehead. She left the bed after that to stumble towards her bag, bending down and grabbing her phone before heading immediately back to the bed.

She crawled over the man laying in it to get on the side she normally slept on, against the wall, and crawling partially under the covers and moving close to Hibiki. The young woman felt well enough to be held again but she was sure he needed her holding him more than that...

Instead of dwelling, she dialed Muika's number and waited...

Aito was all buried in, facing Miyako's side as she crawled over him to move under the covers herself some. He made no move to hold her himself, not sure if she even wanted that all things considered, so instead remained where he was close by and shut his eyes.


Phone...

Muika opened her eyes from her spot in bed, looking over towards her phone set nearby on vibrate. If she'd had the sound on it could have woken Iyuki up, which wasn't needed. Rest was needed more than anything right now after...all of that...

"Hello...?" She answered, her voice a bit quiet, but there was obvious tiredness in it.

Miyako's hand moved to Hibiki's head as she sat there, waiting for Muika to pick up. Her fingers played with his hair to reassure him... In a few he would be getting all the love in the world!

...

Think about Muika!

Speaking of which, the woman picked up and Miyako breathed a relieved little sigh. "You're okay... Phew... Is...Iyuki... okay too?"

She couldn't even say hello, she was worried about the tiredness in Muika's tone but needed that reassurance. "Did you two get caught up in those things too?"