Colors of the Heart

"Mn?" As Miyako spoke, Hibiki glanced to the side towards her, not that he could really see her thanks to their positioning as she bit lightly at his ear.

Food? When he thought about it...not much food had really been had today, and considering how much Miyako ate she was probably starving.

After they bathed they could eat for real then-

Hn?

The candy? He glanced over towards the table, blinking as he saw the bowl she'd mentioned full of konpeito. H-Hah...of all things, why'd it have to be konpeito? S-Sure it was his favorite, but...

"I...I can get the pocky, if you want...carry you... You like that better." Plus they still had a good stock of her favorite kind...wouldn't she prefer that way more...?

Miyako pulled up a bit, away from his neck to see Hibiki's face as they spoke a bit once she'd finished the nomming. She could stare into his hazel eyes and her own green practically shined with love as she smiled at him, her face barely pulled away from his right now.

He looked over at the bowl though and she blinked, confused as he looked back at her and seemed to want to feed her pocky. Miyako shook her head firmly, diving back to cling to him and hold him down on the couch. Or well attempt to, she couldn't if he truly wanted to get up.

"Mm-mm! I wanna stay right here, but... some sugar would be nice. I can eat your favorites sometimes, its not a problem 'Biki." Moving from the couch was forbidden! Her voice had a twinge of pout to it... even being carried wasn't worth moving. "I mean I like konpeito too!"

He was being too sweet, wanting to feed her her favorites but he didn't need to go that far at all! It wasn't needed...

S-She didn't want pocky...? She wanted the konpeito over the pocky because she absolutely didn't want to move... She'd just dove back to him and was now clinging to him.

H...He didn't want to get up either, but it'd seemed like the best choice to him!

P...Pouting!? Was that poutiness in her tone!?

What...What the hell was he supposed to do...?

"...A-Ah..." He didn't want...want to seem weird about this, really...fuck, why'd the konpeito have to be the closest thing!? Talk about opening a damn door of awkward.

There was only one thing he could truly do...

...and that was cave.

With his arm around her, he used his free arm to reach over towards the bowl and pull it to them. It was pretty full still...

Miyako was a bit confused, Hibiki seemed really hesitant and she had entirely forgotten all the things Selena had done with him. Really, early on she was jealous a bit but as time went on the young woman grew more secure in their relationship.

Being able to speak with Selena occasionally and discuss things had helped too, she wasn't 'the other original woman', she was Lena the woman with tons of pets and an cool vampire boyfriend who liked hugs. And snacks, and like teas and coffees... She always greeted him whenever she felt him nearby in the city.

Still, the weirdness lasted until he caved and brought the bowl over. Grinning up a storm, she popped up a bit and giggled as she made sure it was settled properly on Hibiki's chest. Grabbing a handful, she tossed it into her mouth and enjoyed the sweet crunch before she popped another handful in... "Thank yooou!"

Blinking after a moment, she grabbed one out of the bowl and held it up in offering towards Hibiki's lips with a happy grin. "I'll share, promise."

Hibiki watched as Miyako devoured the konpeito, resting his head back as she did so. He'd eat a little in a minute, for now she could get her fill of it.

Just don't think of how awkward this was... That's all he had to do.

H-Hah!?

Hibiki blinked, and blinked again as Miyako offered one of the pieces to him. S-Share... Aha...right.

After a moment of surprise, he did the expected thing and ate it. Just eating candy, that's all it was. Just eating his favorite candy, hell, he'd fed it to her before...granted, not right after sex, but he'd still done it! She was grinning all happily right now too...

Plus, it was his favorite so...nothing weird about it.

Miyako continued on, entirely unaware of the awkwardness or odd feelings Hibiki might be feeling. Though she was starting to pick up a hint of something as she offered him a piece. He'd frozen and blinked a few times, but it wasn't in fluster at all.

It was odd but as he accepted it her smile grew a bit. "You seem a little unhappy... Mm..."

Thinking on how to cheer him up, assuming he might be a little out of sorts instead of anything else, Miyako grabbed another piece and set it against her lips. Then she pushed herself up and leaned over Hibiki a bit, cutely offering him it with her lips. "Mm!"

She couldn't speak, so that 'Mm!' had to stand in for a 'Here!' as her eyes practically sparkled in her attempt to cheer him up. They'd barely kissed at all in the past while, so he deserved them... Maybe that was why he was a bit mopey too! Two birds with one stone...

Mm?

!!?

If just offering the piece of konpeito had caught him by surprise, Miyako's action this time earned a more obvious reaction. J-Just doing that-!?

In his surprise he'd opened his mouth enough for the piece -- s...she was being all cute about it, but just...just offering it like that of all fucking ways-! T-This candy session was gonna kill him...

Once the surprise quelled even a little he was able to lean up enough to take the piece, though he was obviously off from his typically composed state. J...Just focus on the damn candy!

Miyako stared for a moment, a crease on her brow showing her confusion even more before it turned to worry. This really wasn't like Hibiki at all and she wondered if something else was the matter. He wasn't immediately accepting it, in fact it was just super odd that he'd freeze over this. It was his favorite and the man wasn't shy about anything they did. Most of the time at least...

Considering she'd just been moaning his name on top of him... Konpeito sharing wasn't a big deal, but his mouth was just... open and it was... Finally though he moved and Miyako made sure to transfer the konpeito properly...

As Hibiki accepted the kompeito, she kissed him softly before pulling back and quirking her lips in a soft frown. "Hey, whats wrong? Something's up, this isn't something you'd get all weird over Hibiki. I mean you have me feed you it and you feed me... sometimes. So um...?"

Beating around the bush wouldn't do her any good and though her eyes darted away and a hint of a blush appeared at the feeding her it. That was one of the more flustering things...

"A..Ah..." What was wrong? Hibiki blinked again, still coming down from the surprise of everything after swallowing the piece of konpeito. S-Shit...he was being obvious, or well...Miyako was able to tell something was off... Fuck.

How the hell was he supposed to answer that!?

"s'...s'Fine." The concept anyway, definitely... She didn't need to get concerned over this...

His arm around her tightened, and with his free hand he went to place the konpeito filled bowl back on the table before turning on the couch towards Miyako, essentially pulling her closer to him as he shifted them somewhat on their sides before nudging her head again like he had earlier.

There was no way to explain without it ending up awkward as hell...and he honestly hated that.

Miyako just stared as Hibiki attempted to cover with a blatant lie. It was not fine, not at all... She stared, and stared and stared... her disbelief was powerful, radiating off of her even as she laid over him. Even as he put the bowl to the side, even as he held her in place... The young woman was just staring, waiting for him to actually explain...

But he didn't, he just rolled over and attempted to cover it up with more cuddles, which she did not stop. Miyako snuggled up to him as her arms wrapped around his body and frowned, the frown turning into a pout as he just then nudged her head...

What did he think she was?! Stupid?! There had obviously been something wrong!

...But cuddles were cuddles...

After a few moments, Miyako spoke in a deceptively mild tone. "Say... I'm not unobservant. I'm really observant... And even someone who didn't pay attention to you all the time would be able to tell that its totally not fine."

"So...you either tell me or I enter full pout mode and you have to bathe alone." Giving her ultimatum, Miyako stayed snuggled up but really... if something was bothering him it wasn't allowed to stay hidden! He didn't let her get away with that.

So that...didn't work...

Damn it.

Then again, of course it wouldn't... It wasn't like he was doing anything big in attempts of distracting her. He'd just cuddled up to her a bit and that was normal...

He was quiet as she spoke, her words just sinking it in more that she wasn't fooled by anything...and could tell something was off.

Gh...

He gave a breath, "s'Not...that anything is wrong, nothing is... I was just caught by surprise since...gh... There is...s'No way to say this without it sounding awkward...gh...g... I was just caught by surprise since it's a thing...thing..."

God damn it...

"It was just a thing that S...Selena had done, so I got caught by surprise. Nothing's wrong! s'Nothing...wrong with the feeding thing, just caught by surprise..."

Like he said...no way in hell to explain other than it being awkward to an ungodly fucking level!

He had secured his hold around her a bit, attempting to keep her close despite the fact she was already snuggled up pretty close to him, he was sure not to hurt her though, obviously.

"Wasn't bad, just surprising."

Miyako listened, pleased her threats had worked and she felt a smugness rising up in her chest. That... had worked perfectly! She was brilliant! That threat was an instant Hibibs caving one.

However his words quickly distracted her from that thought and all her smugness vanished at his words. Nothing wrong... merely awkward as hell. Surprising and awkward... Because it was something Selena used to do... Well she knew about the feeding konpeito but Miyako read between the lines of Hibiki's words. It'd been something she'd done like they had just. After sleeping with him... feeding him it.

She...vaguely remembered...something about that...

"..." As his hold secured on her, Miyako blinked a few times and tried to find her voice as she fought down the minor jealousy rising up. "...Was it fun?"

"Did you enjoy it that much?" If Hibiki wanted her close right now, she sure as hell wasn't moving an inch as she asked these awkward questions. Miyako wanted him all to herself right now as her nails dug into his back lightly. He had said... awkward and surprising... They weren't bad memories, just...surprising to get from her. Which meant... they were nice memories.

"Hah!?" Was it fun!? What the hell was he supposed to say to that!? How was he supposed to answer that!? Did he enjoy it that much!? H-Hah!?

These felt like dangerous questions to be answering, despite knowing Miyako wouldn't make him feel bad about it or anything. He just didn't want her upset...

"I...Hah... I mean... It was just a relaxing...thing..." After... Gh... How the fuck was he supposed to answer this!? Were her nails digging into him? "M...Miyako...?"

Seriously... Nothing was...wrong with her doing that, it... He didn't want her to feel bad or anything, and these questions just seemed like doorways to making her feel that way to him. These awkward as hell questions...

Miyako felt he shouldn't be surprised, of course she'd want to know... Hibiki skirted around things in regards to his previous lover all of the time. It... was kind of annoying, she wasn't a kid! Though really that had nothing to do with it and she knew it.

It was an awkward thing to talk about but they could. Even if she got jealous, she wanted to know. Even if it annoyed her...

It was just a relaxing thing... Hibiki's earlier reaction had told her that, but it seemed less relaxing more...

"...I wanna know." There was a stubborn lilt to her tone and the way she turned her head against his chest, facing the couch and muffling her voice. "I want to know... if you liked it that much with her. If the memories were nice. I want...you to not skirt around it. Be honest."

"It made you really happy to have her do that, didn't it...?" Otherwise, why would he be so... so defensive over it... Or so secretive... Her hands still dug lightly into his skin, but she had heard the 'after' inherent in his tone so... there was no way she could let go.

"I...I mean... Of course the memories were nice..." She didn't want him trying to skirt around it? She wanted the honesty and he could get that, but... Still...just talking about all of this...

Of course those were nice memories, and he'd enjoyed those moments, but...gh...

"It... A-Ah, it was...nice and all -- yeah...ah..." W-What was he supposed to say!? He wasn't...couldn't lie about it, and more so he didn't want to lie to her in general...

He was a lot of things, but he wasn't a liar... She wanted him to be honest, and he was...trying, it was just...

Answering questions like this... They'd been nice moments, and he'd been comfortable, yeah...

Miyako knew Hibiki was way more open now than he'd been even a month ago, let alone months, plural... Just it still was something that struck her hard hearing that. It... she knew it was. Hibiki didn't attach to others easily, there had to be something to them and they had to have just... wormed their way in.

And he'd admitted to caring strongly... It was just... Something else to hear him outright admitting that he'd... made nice memories. Probably his first truly happy ones, if she was...thinking right.

Miyako was eighteen, she knew she still had a lot of growing to do and it was hard to fight the jealousy. Especially as Hibiki admitted it was nice and all to have her do that...

She tensed up again, before taking a deep breath...letting it out... and not saying a word for a moment as she fought down her immediate instinct to just throw a jealous fit. "I... see."

Her tone came out a bit sharp and she winced at that, not wanting it to...

....

"...." Hibiki let out a sigh, still not releasing Miyako as she answered him like that. That tone and just...what it insinuated was the biggest reason he didn't want to delve into talking about any of that.

He didn't want her upset, and this was the perfect way to make her so.

It'd been...taken awhile just to get her to...or at least cement that he truly wanted this relationship and was perfectly happy, and that she had nothing to worry about even a bit.

She likely still felt insecure sometimes, he could only guess that considering there'd been times where he'd had to go into the longer talks to reassure her of his feelings and other things.

"This...is why I didn't wanna say anything." He finally said, letting out another breath. "...Knew it would upset you...and I don't want that..."

Miyako heard his sigh, but couldn't give him a proper response... Her own feelings were a jumbled mess, not really bad things but just jumbled things. Jealousy warred with the urge to hear more, wanting to know more about things she never really got out of him. Even those little mysteries about him, those tiny bits of times he didn't really like to speak about made her want to know more.

He didn't really like talking about how he was before either, so... It was just all these parts of him she'd never seen, never experienced and never would. Miyako wanted to know, deep down.

She knew it was immature, she knew how he felt and how deep their feelings for each other went. Hell, he could have had Selena still if he'd wanted her. She knew this!

And as he spoke, she lifted her head up and attempted to give him a minor glare. "Hibiki... I want to know... and I am not upset. Really I'm not..."

Her voice came out pouty and also a bit peeved, wanting to fight down the jealousy but not wanting to admit to him that that was what it was.

Miyako was claiming she wasn't upset, but her tone said otherwise, and he blinked down at her and shook his head. "You're upset..."

She was definitely upset, her tone said it all.

Leaning his head down towards hers, nudging her head again in an affectionate gesture in attempt to at least sooth her somewhat. She didn't need to be upset...

They'd been relaxing, and completely comfortable and now they were suddenly on this...

Honestly he just wanted things to go back to relaxing, but he knew if they just dropped it Miyako would just remain upset.

"I-I'm not!" Miyako grumbled and shook her head in return, not accepting his unacceptance of her words. Just...because she sounded upset and seemed upset did not mean she was upset. It was a few things and none of them upset over that!

Just... hard to... to say it... Miyako looked towards the couch as he nudged her head, turning a bright red as he became affectionate towards her. It was cute... and sweet... and just soothing but... Instead of accepting it, her mouth blurted out. "D-Did you...give her affectionate attention like this too?"

...That was unfair, whether he had or not...was fine just... She grumbled to herself, closed her eyes and felt just stupid as she tried to explain.

"...I-It's not...upset... I-Its... um..." Squirming lightly in his arms, not to escape but because she was embarrassed to admit it... Her voice lowered to a whisper as she finally said what it really was... "...I'm jealous."

She was upset.

"You're upset..."

She was denying it, but everything about her gave her away... Her tone, her expression...

This had been the exact reason to not go into this stuff... He wasn't going to lie about how he felt in the previous relationship. he'd already told her before his feelings regarding it...but...

Hah!?

H-Hah!?

That question... W-What...?

Her next words explained a bit more, she was...jealous... T-There wasn't...wasn't a need to be though...

"...A-Affectionate...ah...well...if you...call making jabs at each other that turn into...not really serious spats affectionate then...s...sure?" Hibiki blinked; the relationship with Selena had it's softer points, but...honestly he wasn't nearly as affection in it as he was in his relationship with Miyako.

When it came to Selena they'd mostly riled each other up, and it'd just resulted in not so serious yelling... It wasn't...nuzzles and an endless supply of soft kisses and all that like this was...

He wished he could tell her there wasn't a need for her to be jealous, but...that wasn't going to help anything. For all he knew she felt that way, and couldn't help feeling it, but...

"My...relationship with Selena was different from this, Miyako. I wasn't the affectionate type back then... Hell, I couldn't even manage a hug unless pushed into it."

"Hehe... That sounds... like you two actually..." Affectionate spats and fighting? Jabs at the other... Miyako wasn't the type to be like that, she poked fun sometimes but never like she'd heard those two going at it. If...they had been like this before, then that made sense.

Hibiki was softer with her, like all those sharp edges wore away. It didn't help her jealousy one bit, but that wasn't important at all. It was stupid, something she was fighting and winning mildly against because everything pointed at the lack of reasoning to be so.

"You changed a lot then, Hibiki, in the short time when she... left you alone. ...You've always been affectionate to me, well once we started dating. Before that... you were just really nice." It... wasn't nice to hear he hadn't been affectionate till her, Miyako feeling a bit bad for Selena because she loved it so much to have. Hibiki was such a cuddlebug... "...You had to be pushed into...hugs even with her? I kinda want to see that. Someone pushing you to hug them and you doing it... It sounds a lot different, actually..."

That was really shocking to hear, though she'd sort of vaguely known that... He hadn't been the loving type. He still was only towards her, but... Her hands relaxed a bit but she still stayed firmly attached and snuggled up to him as she began to relax again...

He was owed an explanation though so Miyako shook her head and then leaned forward to kiss his chest. "Don't worry, its...just feelings I can't help. I'm not like... jealous jealous and freaking out. Its just hard to fight these feelings sometimes and hearing all this... mmm doesn't help? Erm... no it does help but just not immediately."

"Delayed helping!" Miyako attempted to salvage her explanation with that exclamation and gave a sheepish giggle after. Just...fight down the jealousy...

He'd changed...? He guessed so, well, for the most part he guessed he had...considering the fact he could actually show affection now to Miyako at least. Hell, he didn't even call himself Aito anymore.

Before that...? Miyako said nice, but Hibiki still wasn't so sure, he'd just figured he'd been quieter more than nice. She'd...seen the kindness though, he'd guessed.

Mn...

W-Wanted to see that? Him being pushed into a hug?

"All it resulted in was a stiff gesture." When he'd been pushed into a hug he'd been stiff, like the gesture was the strangest thing in the world to him at that time...

As he had thought though, these were just...feelings she couldn't help. Hearing him explain all this...didn't help, but it did...delayed...help?

"D...Delayed...helping?" He blinked.

"You were nice. I really mean it, I know you think you were just quiet... But it wasn't just that, you went out of your way to be nice. Really. You really did. Even if you don't see it as such, it was..." Miyako grew frustrated after a few seconds, practically reading his heavy silence as that. It was normal, but right now she was still a bit agitated from the jealousy...

"I'm picturing a dog not wanting hugs now, you know. Just... a stiff dog waiting for it to get it over with. You can't stop me." Bursting into giggles after her pronouncement, Miyako felt amused at the image. "You know you never got stiff when I hugged you. You just melted against me. Remember?"

She'd definitely hugged him and pulled him against her a few times. He'd just let her, wasn't really even stiff about it...

This...helped a bit, the irrational jealousy. Relaxing, Miyako smiled more truly now even as she thought on how to explain that... delayed helping... "Hm..."

"I guess its...I don't get all weird and worry at times, since... I know for sure, that this is how things were between you. Right now I'm all... rawr, you're mine and I don't want someone else to be... be that kind of special to you. Which is true! No one else is, I know. But..." She paused and shook her head, smiling up at Hibiki brightly again. "Later it helps me just... not feel so weird since its not all mysterious and secret. There's no um.. hidden depths to things that I should worry over? Which is stupid, there aren't any. B-But... People worry more about unknowns than...knowing."

And...she'd practically read his mind on the kindness thing. He guessed that was to be expected, at this point she could tell when silence meant there was some negative or unsure thoughts floating in his mind, or if he was silently retorting what she'd said.

"A...A dog not wanting..." T-That's what she pictured? Well, he never really retorted anything regarding him being like a dog, but... Of all things she got that image?

Well, she was laughing again and that's what was important to him...

Never got stiff though...when she hugged him? Well... He'd just...um...

"Um...n..." No way to retort...

Talking about this helped, though not immediately... Knowing was better than...leaving it unknown... No one else was as special to him as Miyako was, which she knew...but she was getting jealous...but...later on this would all help...

Mn...